How Company Views Its Employees

Gender problems are always an issue in the office, and woman usually is the victims. These post is an example of how a company views its employees, based on their gender. One same case can results as different opinions, depends on its done by HE or SHE. Some people would find these things as a joke, will the other will consider it as a bittersweet truth:


1. The family picture is on HIS desk.
(Ah, a solid, responsible family man.)
The family picture is on HER desk.
(Umm, her family will come before her career.)

2. HIS desk is cluttered.
(He's obviously a hard worker and a busy man.)
HER desk is cluttered.
(She's obviously a disorganised scatterbrain.)


3. HE is talking with his co-workers.
(He must be discussing the latest deal.)
SHE is talking with her co-workers.
(She must be gossiping.)

4. HE's not at his desk.
(He must be at a meeting.)
SHE's not at her desk.
(She must be in the ladies' room.)

5. HE's not in the office.
(He's meeting with customers.)
SHE's not in the office.
(She must be out shopping.)

6. HE's having lunch with the boss.
(He's on his way up.)
SHE's having lunch with the boss.
(They must be having an affair.)

7. The boss criticized HIM.
(He'll improve his performance.)
The boss criticized HER.
(She'll be very upset.)

8. HE got an unfair deal.
(Did he get angry?)
SHE got an unfair deal.
(Did she cry?)

9. HE's going on a business trip.
(It's good for his career.)
SHE's going on a business trip.
(What does her husband say?)

10 . HE's leaving for a better job.
(He knows how to recognize a good opportunity.)
SHE's leaving for a better job.
(Women are not dependable.)

It is not a Humor Post!

Funny or not, you have to believe me that this is a humor blog, and you better know that we are not trying to make you laugh or smile even a little through the jokes which is contained in this site. What we're trying to do right now is just to make sure that the humor and jokes keyword will be on the first paragraph of this post.

Got You! Of course I am just kidding.

Since this is a humor blog what we always try to do is just make sure you will get the funny quotes and jokes whether it was labeled with a funny poem, funny adult comic, picture, funny video, etc.

Oh no I started it again and I can see the red horns getting grow on your smokey head, really sorry for that!

Perhaps your face looks like these women' by now.

or looks like these angry guys just because of our bad jokes,

so you started yelling at this blog,



want to stab its author just like a hamburger,



finally you can't stand to our humors and jokes anymore

But I am sure you will smile soon when you know that you are at the end of this article



even laugh.



Hope this humor and all jokes in this web is funny enough for you!

Dogs are Men Best Friends...Literally!

The most popular jokes for ages are jokes about man and woman, even though some people might consider this kind of humor as abusive or inappropriate. Personally, I don't think people should take seriously for any joke, because it was only meant for fun.

This time I post another joke about gender, following the previous post about computer gender and why Santa Claus is a woman.


These are the reasons why some men prefer dog rather than women:

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don’t notice if you call them by another dog’s name.


3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog’s parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.



6. You never have to wait for a dog; they’re ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you’re drunk.


8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, ‘If I died, would you get another dog?’

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don’t get mad. They just think it’s interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

And last, but not least:

14. If a dog leaves, it won’t take half of your stuff.

Like I said earlier, "some" men, not all of them. Once again, this just a joke.

10 Reasons to Smile

This blog is called "Just Have Fun and Enjoy Your Life", and the sign of someone who enjoyed his/her life is by the smile. Smiling is look like a simple thing, but do you know if that action has a great effects?

Smile also benefits both for the giver and the taker, even to someone else who accidentally saw your smile. So now let's see these 10 reasons why we must smile often:

1. Smile gives you a better look
Not even the most beautiful/handsome people in the world will look interesting if they weren't smiling. No matter how you thinking about yourself, when you're smiling others will think better of you.

2. It changes your mood
Try to smile when you're feeling down or gloomy. It might be difficult, but if you can produce a nice firm and loose smile, you'll feel lighter.

3. It affects other people to smile back
Smiling is like influenza, it contagious. When you're smiling to a person, big chance he/she will smiles back to you. Prove it!

4. It reduces your stress
All troubles and pressures, either it from work or daily life, also always come with a way out or solution. Smile is the first step to find that way.

5. Smile increases your body immune system
This one is a medical fact and has been proven. Your immune system is directly related with your body state. Smile makes you relax, thus improves your immune.


6. It also reduces your blood pressure
Same with before. You even can prove it by checking your blood pressure at home. See how smiling can reduce your blood pressure.

7. It seduces your brain to release endorphin and serotonin hormones
These both hormones are a natural painkiller, this make smile as a natural medicine.

8. Stretch your face skin, thus make you looks younger
Smile is also work of a muscle. When you're smiling you also give a workout to your face muscle, make your skin more elastic and gives a younger appearance.

9. It makes you have a better confidence
Try to smiling when you're on a meeting, presentation, or in your first date. It will makes you looks like a successful and confident person.

10. It makes you stay positive
Smile right now. Then, think about your bad past experiences. See how the smile gone? That's because when you're smiling it send a signal to your body that everything is all right.

So, keep smiling people.

Santa Claus is a Woman!!

For those women who didn't like my previous post about how engineers explain them, it's payback time! Because today is Christmas, let's talk about Santa.

You know, for some reasons I think that Santa Clause is a woman. Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull it all off!

Another reasons why Santa can't possibly be a man:

• Men can't pack a bag.
• Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.
• Men would feel their masculinity is threatened...having to be seen with all those elves.
• Men don't answer their mail.
• Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in jest as anything remotely resembling a "bowlful of jelly."

I don't mind if Santa is a woman, especially if she looks like the girls above

• Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing them.
• Having to do the Ho Ho Ho thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up women.
• They'd soon be lost in snow, because their ego prevent them to ask direction
  
• Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.

Merry Christmas Everybody!

Dictionaries for Couples

Men vs Women Jokes always interesting to listen, and it's always funny. You can check my post about Computer Gender for an example. Now, let's learn some simple english for understand better about what a man and woman thinking when they're telling you something.

The Man's Guide to Female English...

We need = I want
It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
You’re...so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
You’re certainly attentive tonight! = Is sex all you ever think about?
I’m not emotional! And I’m not overreacting! = I’ve got my period
I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper ...
I need wedding shoes = the other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of white
Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re not going to like



I’ll be ready in a minute = kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I’m beautiful
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Yes = No
No = No
Maybe = No
I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry
I’m not yelling! = Yes I’m yelling because I think it’s important
All we’re going to buy is a soap dish = It goes without saying that we’re stopping at the cosmetics department, the shoe department, I need to look at a few purses, and those sheets would look great in the bedroom and did you bring your check book?


The Woman's Guide to Male English...

I’m hungry = I’m hungry
I’m sleepy = I’m sleepy
I’m tired = I’m tired
Do you want to go to a movie = I’d eventually like to have sex with you
Can I take you out to dinner? = I’d eventually like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime? = I’d eventually like to have sex with you
May I have this dance? = I’d eventually like to have sex with you
Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to fondle you
What’s wrong? = I don’t see why you’re making such a big deal out of this
What’s wrong? = what meaningless, self inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now?
What’s wrong? = I guess sex tonight is out of the question
I’m bored = Do you want to have sex?
I love you = Let’s have sex now
I love you, too = Okay, I said it...we’d better have sex now!
Yes, I like the way you cut your hair = I liked it better before
Yes, I like the way you cut your hair = $50 and it doesn’t look that much different!
Let’s talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and maybe then you’d like to have sex with me
Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for other men to have sex with you
I like that one better (while shopping) = Pick any frigging dress and let’s get out of here.

What is Love?

Take a look at this picture, and understand about love better. Sometimes we can learn from the nature to make ourself a better person. As always, just have fun and enjoy your life!!

Evolution Theory

Who is right? Darwin with his evolution theory or religion with Adam and Eva? Ahh...doesn't matter, let's just have fun with these funny pictures about evolution. Smile!

Stupid and Funny Questions

Please answers these stupid questions for me.....
Have Fun!!

How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

How do "please keep off the grass" signs get there?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of murdered?

If people can put up nude statues everywhere, then why can't we run around naked?

If Hooters started a door-to-door service would they then be called knockers?

How come a pizza can get to ur house faster than an ambulance?

They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?

What does the K in K-mart actually stand for?

Why do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?

Why are boxing rings square?

Have you ever thought what life would be like if your name was Anonymous? You'd get credit for everything nobody wanted credit for!

Can blind people see their dreams?

What is a free gift? Aren't all gifts free?

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God....I could be eating a slow learner!

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes...why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.

Why do we say "heads up" when we actually duck?

When the stock market closes at the end of the day, why does everyone stand around smiling and clapping regardless of whether the stocks are up or down?

When a store has double doors why do they only let you use one of them?

Why can't you get a tan on your palms?

If mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?

If a missing person sees their picture on a milk carton that offers a reward, would they get the money?

Why is it that humans can move their eyes in opposite directions toward the nose, but not away from the nose?

Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are both the same number of letters?

Why is snow white and ice clear? Aren't they just different forms of water?

Computer Gender

Funny Opinion about whether Computer is a Male or Female

As you are aware, ships have long been characterized as being female (e.g., "Steady as she goes" or "She`s listing to starboard, Captain!")

Recently, a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that computers should also be referred to as being female. Their reasons for drawing this conclusion follow:

Five reasons to believe computers are female:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.

3. The message "Bad command or file name" is about as informative as, "If you don`t know why I`m mad at you, then I`m certainly not going to tell you."

4. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.

5. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

However, another group of computer scientists, (all female) think that computers should be referred to as if they were male. Their reasons follow:

Five reasons to believe computers are male:

1. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.

2. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.

3. As soon as you commit to one you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have obtained a better model.

4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

5. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.

How to Smile

Have You Smiled Today ??

Do you know that smiled is contagious like influenza? Today someone smiled to me and I smiled back to him/her. Someone in the corner saw me smile, and he smiled too...

So if you feel like want to smile, don't hold back. Spread the virus of smiling all over the world. Let's make this world a better place by smiling.

Do you know how to smile? Let me show you how......

Now pass it on and make someone else smile !!!